At work this morning I picked a piece of paper off the floor – something I would usually just throw directly into the bin, but this had been fashioned into the shape of a joint, so curiosity got the better of me and I unrolled it.

Inside was the message, in a hasty hand: Phone The Wife.

Nothing else. No reason why, and no time frame in which to make this call. It was like it was part of a checklist that he was making sure he ticked off before going to bed at night. I guess kudos to him for being so organised.

I don’t know why the husband in question felt it necessary to remind himself to call his wife. I mean, it’s probably something that every good husband should be doing as a matter of course anyway, right? Was he going to forget to do it? Well maybe he would now that he had lost his note.

I didn’t recognise the handwriting either, but that’s probably for the best.