Grumpy Old Man (Items 41 – 45)…

Here are a few more items for the bottomless well…

  • People who, when you tell them that you don’t think most people do a particular thing, say: well I do… as if their single voice in the wind constitutes most of the seven billion other folk on this planet that I was referring to in the first place. Most people don’t write cheques anymore. Oh, you do? Well, gee, I guess I was wrong then…
  • Passwords on every website. And they’re not just words, like they used to be. No. Nowadays a password has to include three non-sequential upper case letters, two digits, a non-numeric symbol, and a sesame seed bun. And then you are advised not to use the same password for multiple accounts… which nobody listens to because we all just hold on to one word and flip it around a thousand different ways.
  • People who arrive at the cinema late. I don’t care how late you are – even if you come in during the opening credits – if you want to squeeze past me with your oversized tub of popcorn and that ginormous plastic Pepsi, you’re going to know about it, because I’m going to tell you. This is even more annoying at the theatre. I would welcome a ruling that precludes any latecomers from taking their seat until the interval, and if you pitch up late after the interval, well guess what? You’ve just missed the end of the show!
  • And still at the cinema, what’s with the people who sit down with what appears to be their entire calorific intake for that day while they’re watching a movie? I’m surprised some of these people don’t just pitch up with a fork and knife. It’s never a quiet or odourless food either – it’s always super-crunchy nachos smothered in the strongest smelling cheese that’s ever reached your nostrils.
  • People who ask what you are doing when they can quite clearly see what it is you are doing. It’s a redundant question, so why ask?

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